Every other day,
I see either a tweet, status or Instagram story where someone admits to the big black hole of self-doubt. Whilst 90% of these claims are made to humour, grab a few RT's and become the next #relatable account, the real context beneath them is that people are comparing themselves to others and feel as if they're falling behind.
As a generation we have become obsessed with the need to constantly change our lives to fit in with 'the now'...be it our hair, fashion sense, Instagram theme, or as drastic as a huge lifestyle change and career move. We have the continuous desire to find out what our sole purpose in life is, without finding time to appreciate what we have now and settle with what we are currently successful in.
Success has become so heavily measured by the standards of other people that our own values and fulfilment have become so far removed. It no longer seems to be measured by sentimental value, where by being the most kindest person with the purest intentions takes you to the top of the hierarchy. A CEO is regarded as more successful as someone who works for a charity...because now it's all about grafting & getting those opportunities. That's not to say I'm disregarding those business CEO's who put in the work to get where they are, women in particular, but isn't it funny that we're saying women are more successful now because they're business women, not because of the jobs they had before??
Too often I see Mums feeling unsuccessful and in competition with other women because they chose to have children & raise a family rather than dedicate their time to working. The reality is: if you are living a life that makes your heart full and gives you that great sense of contentment, you are successful. Success is a feeling created from yourself, not by the judgement of others.
I suppose I just want to use this blog post as a way to remind people to click out of social media, zoom out of other people's lives, and look back at their own. I too am guilty of thinking I am falling behind others, as I have not yet done any work experience for uni (ya gal is doing it in London next month tho wooooooo) & haven't even thought about my third year project, whereas it seems everyone and their Nan has it all sorted. But as a favour to myself (currently thanking January 1st 2019 Amy), I created a note in my phone titled "Everything I said yes to in 2019". So whenever I feel myself falling into the pit that is the endless social media scroll & compare, I can look back at the note and see what I've done & managed to succeed in so far!
Because if we can't be our own biggest cheerleader, how can we expect anyone else to be?
